I've heard from many that blogging can be a form of therapy. So I'm going to give it a try.
As many of you know, we're looking to move so that we're closer to Jeromy's work and so we can have a yard for the kids (okay, let's face it, a bigger house for all my stuff). We went looking at some houses on Saturday and fell in love with one. It's big, has a big yard, and a lot of extras. The kitchen is awesome, with black granite counters and cherry wood cabinets, brand new stainless steel appliances, and lots of storage. All of the bathrooms have gorgeous granite counters and beautiful brand new cabinets. The master bath even has a vanity. 2 closets (one of them a walk-in) in the master bedroom, a laundry shoot, brand new carpet, and a big food storage area for all my couponing trophies. But the best of all was the backyard. A huge deck with a built-in jacuzzi. On the other side of the deck, it's kind of circular with built-in seating, so it's perfect for a fire pit, with plenty of room for a grill also. Plus, a sandpit with a swing set, lots of trees, and a good-size lawn for the kids to run around. Ya, it was the wow factor throughout.
We can really picture ourselves in that house. So, we thought it would be wise if we went to that ward on Sunday to check it out before we went any further. That's what my parents always did when they were moving, so why not? In retrospect, it probably wasn't a great idea. First of all, what if the owners were there (luckily that house was vacant)? Or what if we offended somebody by saying that we were just checking out the ward, and then we moved in? Or what if we didn't like the ward but love the house? You can probably guess what happened. Our whole married lives (almost 7 years), we've been in wards that had mostly people our age, so we've gotten kind of used to it. This ward was an older ward; I didn't see anybody our age, which to me means that it would be harder (but not impossible) to make friends. I already don't look forward to starting over in that respect, and would just rather stay here so I don't have to go back to my comfort zone of insecurities. Anyway, we just weren't feeling it there. And now we feel like ward snobs, cuz the church is true everywhere, so what are we worrying about? And maybe the Lord could really use us there or something. Or maybe we could use a little humbling.
Maybe the best thing for my "therapy session" would be to list pros and cons:
Pros:
-15 minutes from Jeromy's work (instead of at LEAST 30 minutes- and his work is going to be getting more time intensive very soon)
-big yard with extras (did I mention the wrap around porch?)
-really nice kitchen
-2 stories with 4 bedrooms
-lots of storage
-room to grow in unfinished basement
-a garage!
Cons:
-Not in Utah County (so it has that bigger city feel- not a big feeling of community)
-Different kind of ward
-Older house
-No new furniture for awhile
-No toy room for the kids till we can save enough to finish basement
-Start over making friends (for me AND the kids)
-Oh, and the WHOLE house inside is painted PEACH, ilch
-No more babysitting group, i.e. no more dates for awhile :(
So I guess the question is would I rather have a bigger house, a husband, and no friends or a smaller house, no husband, and lots of friends. Jeromy will be uber busy both ways anyway. And if we stay we could afford to buy new furniture and finish the basement. Jeromy says I'll always have my virtual friends. Har har. He makes me sound like a video game fanatic. I love my husband dearly so the best way to support him would be to move as close to work as possible. So we're going to see a few more houses tomorrow to cover all the bases before we make any more decisions.
Sorry for sounding like such a whiner. I guess I need to just be grateful for this opportunity.
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2 comments:
ok -- well I see wisdom in attending the ward first but not sure I agree with it . . . that's how some of my favorite people picked their house.
But I would also say don't rule out the older wards. I've never lived in utah valley but our first ward in vegas was old and small -- we LOVED it. next ward in vegas was SUPER young and it just so happened much more stuck up and clique-ish, despite (or because of) the fact it had so many young couples. Our Iowa ward was older with only a few young couples -- it was also our next favorite. It just makes the younger ones closer when we're all each other has. So, I guess I'd judge a ward on its friendliness and not on the age I guess is what I'm trying to say.
But I think you'll be able to weigh the options based on your priorities. D & I bought the bigger house in the older ward in Idaho and we're still adjusting. It's good though.
Your virtual friends (me included) could tell you what we all think you should do but it comes down to your priorities and what is best for your family. If Jeromy is going to be gone so much it would be nice if you were in a community where you felt safe with friends close by.
I wouldn't necessarily choose a big/nice house just because it was big/nice, the area is a big deal to me though (which includes the ward).
Older wards can be great. You'll probably be put in those calling that are more centered around young kids though (PRIMARY). My dad always says that the Lord can use you wherever you decide to go; He doesn't necessarily care which house you choose!
Good Luck! House hunting can be fun! The moving part it the part that stinks!!
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